Q: How is Christmas celebrated in a Jewish home? A: They put parking meters on the roof!
A boy comes home from school and tells his mother that he got a part in the school play. “What part?” the mother asked. “I play a Jewish husband,” the boy replied. “Go back to school and tell your teacher that you want a speaking role!”
Did you hear about the New 3 Million Dollar Alabama State Lottery? 3 dollars a year for a million years.
A black guy walks into a tavern with a parrot on his shoulder…the bartender looks up and says ” where the hell did you get that thing? The Parrot replies ” Over in Africa, there’s millions of them ” !!!!
What’s the difference between an Italian mother and a Jewish mother? An Italian mother says, “If you don’t eat it, I’ll kill you.” A Jewish mother says, “If you don’t eat it, I’ll kill myself.”
How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? They all gather around their cash registers and sing “What a Friend We Have In Jesus…”
Did you hear about the man who was half Jewish & half Italian? He made himself an offer he couldn’t understand.
Q: Why did the Jews wander in the desert for forty years? A: Somebody dropped a shekel.
Q: What happened to the Irishman who tried to kill himself by .swallowing 100 pain killers? A: After two he began to feel better.
Q: Where do you find 60 million french jokes? A: In France.