A blind man walks into a store with his seeing
| Blind jokes
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking around."
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Q: What's the inscription on
| Music jokes
Q: What's the inscription on dead blues-singers tombstones? A: "I didn't wake up this morning..."
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Why does the monster act wild
| Birthday jokes
Why does the monster act wild and crazy on his birthday? He's trying to age disgracefully!
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All of these pilot and aviation jokes get me
| Aviation jokes
All of these pilot and aviation jokes get me to thinking about my first skydiving instructor. During class he would always take the time to answer any of our stupid first-timer questions. One guy asked, "If our chute doesn't open, and the reserve doesn't open, how long do we have until we hit
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What do you get when a cow goes to the Beach with
| Cow jokes
What do you get when a cow goes to the Beach with tanning oil? Pre-tanned leather.
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A man walking along a country road comes across a farmer droving a huge mob of sheep. He stops and chats for a while and then says, “Tell you what, I’ll bet you $100 against one of your sheep that I can tell you the exact number in that flock.” The farmer thinks for a moment, it is a big mob and he can’t see how anyone could guess correctly so he says, “OK. You’re on.” “Nine hundred and thirty two,” says the man. The farmer takes off his hat and scratches his head. “I don’t know how you did it but that’s exactly right. A bet’s a bet. Take any sheep.” The man picks up an animal and is about to walk off when the farmer says, “Hang on. Bet you double or nothing that I can guess your occupation.” The man thinks, “How would he know, he’s never met me before” and says “Righto. You’re on”. The farmer says, “You’re an auditor with a Big Four firm.” The man whistles . “How the heck did you know that?” “Well,” says the farmer, “put my dog down and I’ll tell you.”