Category Archives: Police jokes

A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102. Already there is a long-time resident who looks 100 years old. The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly. The old-timer says, “Look at me. I’m old and worn out. You’d … Continue reading →

A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car. After looking the man over he says, “Sir, I couldn’t help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?” The man … Continue reading →

Driving to work, a gentlman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seen the carton in … Continue reading →

The Boston taxi driver backed into the stationary fruit stall and within seconds he had a cop beside him. “Name?” “Brendan O’Connor.” “Same as mine. Where are you from?” “County Cork.” “Same as me……” The policeman paused with his pen … Continue reading →

Lady:(standing in the middle of a busy street) Officer, can you tell me how to get to the Hospital? Officer: Just stand where you are!!!

A man leaves a bar, gets into his car and drives away. 200 yards further he’s stopped by a police officer. Officer: “Good evening sir. We’re testing drivers for drunken driving. Would you please blow into this machine?”. Man: “I’m … Continue reading →

Why do Iraqi police officers walk in threes? The first knows how to read, the second knows how to write and the third is to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

Veronica was practicing the piano when suddenly there was a loud pounding on the front door. She opened it and found a breathless cop. “What’s the matter?!” she asked. “Where’s the body?!” demanded the officer. “What are you talking about?” … Continue reading →

Police Chief: Why do you spend all your time trying to hit flies? Officer: You assigned me to the swat team, didn’t you?

Police Chief: Why did you tie a rope on that criminal? Officer: You ordered me to get a line on the suspect.