Q: Why did the blonde fail her drivers licence
| Blonde jokes
Q: Why did the blonde fail her drivers licence ? A: She wasn't used to the front seat!
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Three buddies die in a car crash, and
| Heaven and hell jokes
Three buddies die in a car crash, and they go to heaven to an orientation. They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you? The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great do
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What are ants called when they run away very
| Insect jokes
What are ants called when they run away very fast to get married? Ant-elopers.
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Father Christmas: I thought I asked you to
| Christmas jokes
Father Christmas: I thought I asked you to go out there and clear the snow! I'm on my way, Father Christmas. Father Christmas: But you only have one welly on! That's all right! There's only one foot of snow!
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Q: How many Osamas does it take to screw in a
| Ethnic jokes
Q: How many Osamas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: None. They don't have lightbulbs in caves'
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St. Peter is questioning three married couples to see if they qualify for admittance to heaven. “Why do you deserve to pass the Pearly Gates?” he asks one of the men, who had been a butler. “I was a good father,” he answers. “Yes, but you were a drunk all your life. In fact, you were so bad you even married a woman named Sherry. No admittance.” St. Peter then turned to the next man, a carpenter, and asked him the same question. The carpenter replied that he had worked hard and taken good care of his family. But St. Peter also rejected him, pointing out that he had been an impossible glutton, so much so that he married a woman named BonBon. At this point the third man, who had been a lawyer, stood up and said, “Come on, Penny, let’s get out of here.”