Waiter, what is this hare doing in my
| Rabbit jokes
Waiter, what is this hare doing in my salad? I believe he's eating your lettuce.
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Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies
| Music jokes
Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what life in Heaven is like. Poor Max has a heart attack and dies. He manages to make contact with Abe the next day. Abe says, "I can't believe this worked! So what is it like in Heaven?" Max replies,
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How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf?
| Cannibal jokes
How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf? He became a vegetarian.
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What dog is always tired in London?
| Dog jokes
What dog is always tired in London? An English sleep dog.
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I was so sorry to hear you buried your mother last week. Well, we had to, you know, she was dead.