Mrs. Ellis came home from

What do you get if you cross an Egyptian

| Car and train jokes

What do you get if you cross an Egyptian mummy with a car mechanic? Toot and Car Man.

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Why doesn't a dog

| Dog jokes

Why doesn't a dog ever have a nose 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.

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What does the N on the Nebraska

| College jokes

What does the N on the Nebraska football helmet stand for? "Nowledge."

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Where do Snowmen go to dance?

| Snowman jokes

Where do Snowmen go to dance? To snowballs.

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What happened to the girl who

| Halloween jokes

What happened to the girl who wore a mouse costume to her Halloween party? The cat ate her.

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Mrs. Ellis came home from work one evening to find her three-year-old son lighting up a cigar. She raced into the kitchen where her husband was making dinner. “Hey!” she announced. “This is terrible! I just caught Matthew lighting a cigar!” “You put a stop to that right now,” he shouted. “That kid is altogether too young to be playing with matches!”