Who won the Monster Beauty Contest?
| Beauty jokes
Who won the Monster Beauty Contest? No one.
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Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair
| Hair and bald jokes
Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair all down her back. Harry: Pity it's not on her head!
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What's the difference between a peeping Tom and
| Bath jokes
What's the difference between a peeping Tom and someone who's just got out of the bath? One is rude and nosey. The other is nude and rosey!
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The new office-boy came
| Telephone jokes
The new office-boy came into his boss's office and said, "I think you're wanted on the phone, sir." "What d'you mean, you think?" demanded the boss. "Well, sir, the phone rang, I answered it and a voice said 'is that you, you old fool?"
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What is the last thing you eat before
| Dead and dying jokes
What is the last thing you eat before you die? You bite the dust.
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Men are like placemats. They only show up when there’s food on the table.