Why do you go to bed?
| Bed jokes
Why do you go to bed? Because the bed will not come to you.
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I've been sitting at this computer for hours
| Computer jokes
I've been sitting at this computer for hours and I haven't seen a single website. That's because you're supposed to sit facing the screen.
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A driver tucked this note under the
| Car and train jokes
A driver tucked this note under the windshield wiper of his automobile. "I've circled the block for 20 minutes. I'm late for an appointment, and if I don't park here I'll lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses." When he came back he found a parking ticket and this note: "I've circled the block
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What kind of ghosts haunt operating
| Dead and dying jokes
What kind of ghosts haunt operating theatres? Surgical spirits.
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How many judges does it take to
| Judge jokes
How many judges does it take to change a light bulb? Just one; he holds it still and the whole world revolves around him. Just one, but two lawyers have to explain him how to do it.
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A man is hired by the circus to perform a necessary but rather unpleasant task. He is asked to walk behind the elephants in the center ring, shoveling aside their droppings as they walk about. After a rather difficult evening at work, he goes to the circus cafeteria, sits with other workers, and begins complaining about his work. “It’s just terrible work, walking behind those huge beasts and first dodging, then shoveling aside the dung they produce. My arms are tired, my shoes and pants are a mess, and I’ll have to shower before I return home, because of the stink.” His friends at work agree: “Why don’t you just quit this miserable job and find something more rewarding to do. You have to have some skills and talents that you can put to use somewhere else.” He looks at them, stunned: “You know, you’re probably right, but I just can’t give up the glamour of show business!”