A retiring farmer in preparation for selling

This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf

| Aviation jokes

This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew Id like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic. If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you

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Willie: "I have an awful

| Teeth jokes

Willie: "I have an awful toothache." Tommie: "I'd have it taken out if it was mine." Willie: "Yes, if it was yours, I would, too."

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Why don't vikings send e-mails?

| E-mail jokes

Why don't vikings send e-mails? They prefer to use Norse code.

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Why did the Scottish cannibal

| Cannibal jokes

Why did the Scottish cannibal live on a sugar plantation? He said So that I can feed my lads with m'lasses!

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Shhaaayyy, buddy, whats a

| Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

Shhaaayyy, buddy, whats a Breathalyzer? asked one drunk to his friend at the next barstool. "Well, I'd have to say that it's a bag that tells you when you've drunk way too much," answered the equally wasted gent. "Ah hell, whaddya know? I've been married to one of those for years!"

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A retiring farmer in preparation for selling his land, needed to rid his farm of animals. So he went to every house in his town. To the houses where the man is the boss, he gave a horse. To the houses where the woman is the boss, a chicken was given. He got toward the end of the street and saw a couple outside gardening. “Who’s the boss around here?” he asked. “I am.” said the man. “I have a black horse and a brown horse,” the farmer said, “which one would you like?” The man thought for a minute and said, “The black one.” “No, no, no, get the brown one.” the man’s wife said. “Here’s your chicken.” said the farmer.