How do you keep a dog from barking in your

Why did the pig have ink all over his face?

| Face jokes

Why did the pig have ink all over his face? Because it came out of the pen.

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What kind of typewriters do vampires like?

| Vampire jokes

What kind of typewriters do vampires like? Blood type-writers.

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When should you feel sorry for a

| Various animal jokes

When should you feel sorry for a skunk? When its spray pump is out of order!

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What did the man put on his car when

| Car and train jokes

What did the man put on his car when the weather was cold? An extra muffler.

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What are you reading? demanded

| Parent jokes

What are you reading? demanded the father of his seven-year-old. "A story about a cow jumping over the moon," was the reply. "Throw that book away at once," he commanded. "How many times have I told you you're too young to read science fiction?"

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How do you keep a dog from barking in your front yard? Put him in your back yard.