What’s long, hard, and has semen in it?

A guy goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I

| Mental health jokes

A guy goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam; then I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?" The doctor replies: "It's very simple. You're two tents."

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A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the

| Lawyer jokes

A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken and considerable damage. There's no sign of the offending vehicle but he's relieved to see that there's a note stuck under the windshield wiper. "Sorry. I just backed into your Beemer. The witnesses who saw the accident are nodding

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What do you call a robbery in China ?

| Criminal jokes

What do you call a robbery in China ? A Chinese take away !

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A military cargo plane, flying over a

| Aviation jokes

A military cargo plane, flying over a populated area, suddenly loses power and starts to nose down. The pilot tries to pull up, but with all their cargo, the plane is too heavy. So he yells to the soldiers in back to throw things out to make the plane lighter. They throw out a pistol. "Throw o

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How do heavy

| Internet jokes

How do heavy metal bands surf the web? On the Din-ternet.

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What’s long, hard, and has semen in it? A submarine!