What is long and yellow and always points

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one

| Police jokes

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one Caller: Hi, is this the police? Dispatcher: This is 911. Do you need police assistance? Caller: Well, I don't know who to call. Can you tell me how to cook a turkey? I've never cooked one before.

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A Chihuahua was shopping in a mall when another

| Dog jokes

A Chihuahua was shopping in a mall when another shopper walked up to it and started talking. Didn't I see you on a TV commercial? How am I supposed to know what you watch on TV?

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What kind of street does a ghost like best?

| Ghost jokes

What kind of street does a ghost like best? A dead end.

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What do you get if you cross a snake and a lego

| Snake jokes

What do you get if you cross a snake and a lego set ? A boa constructor !

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Why is a fish easy to weigh ?

| Fishing jokes

Why is a fish easy to weigh ? Because it has its own scales !

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What is long and yellow and always points north? A magnetic banana.