Category Archives: Money jokes

Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player? Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.

What dog has money? A bloodhound, because he is always picking up scents (cents).

If George Washington were alive today, why couldn’t he throw a silver dollar across the Potomac? Because a dollar doesn’t go as far as it used to.

Why was the skunk arrested for counterfeiting? Because he gave out bad scents (cents).

Who makes a million dollars a day? Someone who works in a mint.

If you had a million dollars and gave away one quarter, and another quarter, and then another quarter, how much would you have left? A million dollars minus 75 cents.

How did rich people get their money? They were calm and collected.

Which is better, an old ten dollar bill or a new one? An old ten dollar bill is better than a new one.

What lands as often on its tail as it does its head? A penny.

If you take half from a half dollar, what do you have? A dollar.